Monday, June 20, 2011

It's been a week of tears and squalor and unwashed hair

And suddenly this morning, my soul has returned to my body; both of us worse for wear. But somehow I am able to pick up the dirty clothes that start on the front doormat and extend all the way to the corner of the bedroom. I am able to put on the recording of Bach's Art of the Fugue. I am able to reply civilly if tersely to emails from work. I am able to eat pears and not cake for breakfast.

The windows have been pushed all the way open to admit the rain that has poured for 4 days. I am about to make the gritty bed and start on the dishes. I have finally stopped running away from home, and I will not go anywhere or see anyone today.


  1. Ah.
    Bach's Fuges.....mathematics for the soul.
    Be well.

  2. And this sounds like truly, rawly, living. Being present. Even through the shit.

    I hope that pear is crunchy-sweet!

  3. i just want you to know that when you left that comment a while back it made a world of a difference to me, that someone i dont really know had something so nice to say!
    i hope you feel better. i hope you will take care of yourself. that youll feel happiness, even when you dont think youre capable of it.
    believe me, changing the sheets and making the bed is always the first step :)

  4. so glad you made it through to the other side...


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